why "bad" things will always happen to you..

So I was reading in Matthew last night when I happened upon an old parable. I think this is probably one of the first ones they teach you in Sunday school, it's definitely one of the first Sunday school songs you learn. I don't know what made me read it last night, well, I mean I do now, but at the time I was like, "well this is always a good reminder I guess, why not read it again?"

The Wise and Foolish Builders

For those of you who have not heard this one yet let me fill you in.

Matthew 7:24-27

"Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the wind blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash."

Simple enough huh?

False.

This is not simple at all.

Here is what I got from this last night that I had not caught for 23 years. (yes I've been reading since I was born smarty pants.)

The storm is inevitable.

Whether you build your house on the rock or the sand, the storm is coming.

It does not say, "The rain might come down, the streams might rise, and the wind might blow and it might beat against your house."

So often I hear Christians who can't understand why bad things happen to them or to good people they know. I have been that Christian. umm...hello! God never said this life would be easy. He has always warned us of the opposite actually. Even since Sunday school He has been warning us of the storms that will inevitably come whether we are ready (rock) or not (sand).

And this warning, persay, isn't just for those who claim to be Christians. This is for "everyone who hears these words of mine.."

Everyone.

So I'm sorry if this is the first time you are hearing His words but now you are included in this..sucker.

Sorry I'm not sorry.

And here is another awesome part. You can not hide from this storm. It will find you. Whether you are on the highest mountain or in the lowest valley, you will be effected by this storm.

I know what you're thinking, "and where is the awesome part?"

You can not hide from God. He always knows where you are. No money in the world can protect you from His love.

Again, I know what you're thinking, "why would I want to be protected from His love?"

Maybe these song lyrics by a Mister David Crowder will help with the picture I am trying to paint here:

"He is jealous for me, loves like a hurricane, I am a tree, bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy. When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory, and I realize just how beautiful You are and how great Your affections are for me."

Don't you get it?

God is the storm.

We have a choice. Accept that the storm is coming and try to prepare OR ignore the warnings of His forthcoming love and choose to live a life that is not worth living.

Yeah a house on the beach sounds awesome! But it will not last.

And just incase you did not catch it, God is not talking about your actual earthly home..although I'm sure He would not suggest that you build on sand. He is talking about you. Your heart. Your body. Your soul. Everything that is you.

You will fail. I will fail. I do fail. What is important is that we learn from past failures. We learn to not build on the sand. I can not even tell you how many beach homes I have tried to build. It's embarrassing how many times I have failed.

You have to get up. God knows you are going to fail even before you start your blue prints. He is waiting for you to call out His name when "the weight of His wind and mercy" makes all of your plans come crashing down around you.

I assure you that His way is best. It will always hurt. Good things take time and endurance.

But do not rest assured in my words, rest assured in the power of His promise that He gives us in Philippians 1:6

"being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."

He knows what He's doing.

So until you see those beautiful clouds rip open and you hear the sound of His glorious trumpets, know that He is not done with you. He has not forgotten about you.

He will finish what He has started.

"And we are His portion and He is our prize. Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes. If His grace is an ocean, we're all sinking. And Heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss, and my heart turns violently inside of my chest. I don't have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way that He loves us. Oh how He loves us.."

The storm is coming. Are you ready?

well don't I feel silly...

In 4 blogs I forgot my creator.
In 2 blogs I lost the man I fell in love with.

sigh...well don't I feel silly..

Why is it that when my life is going awesome, or at least when I think it's going awesome, I just assume that it is how God wants it to be going?

Why is it that when it all came crashing down I forgot Who is in control?

Why do I worry?

Why do I waste my time worrying about things that I can not change?

Why do I constantly waste my time doing everything except what I am actually here to do?

Why do I forget to enjoy my Creator?

At the end of the day, if I did anything but enjoy God, I completely missed the point.

You see there are many reasons why my plans fail...mainly because they are MY plans.

When will I learn that I have no idea what I am doing? When will I learn that God's way is ALWAYS the best way? It's easy to think that when things are going my way because, well like I said, I just assume that God and I are on the same page.

When I do things my way, whether it is out of disobedience or ignorance, it is literally ALWAYS an epic fail. On so many levels.

You see when we do things our way we are not the only ones affected when it all comes crashing down. And it will come crashing down. And there is nothing you can do about it.

Nothing.

Trust me.

Nothing.

You see because God's plan is ALWAYS better.

Yes, even the brokenness He sends my way.

Because it is in the brokenness where I learn the most about myself, where I learn to grow stronger so that maybe, just maybe, I wont continue to get back up and do the same thing over and over again.

And here's the beauty in all of this:

Grace.

Breathe it in.

Beautiful, sweet, unending, incomprehensible grace.

Free.

....what?! Free?

Yeah. Free.

You just have to accept it.

And here is the tricky part. I know it may sound easy to accept grace, but for me, it is not.

I constantly find myself doing what the devil wants me to do; beating myself up.

You see last year around this time I was in a similar situation. Single.

I now have a choice. Do I do what I did last year and go down the always "fun" but never actually fun road? Or do I worship the God who gives but inevitably takes away?

Do I pretend like this didn't hurt? Or do I accept the pain as beautiful?

Do I pretend like it wasn't love? Or do I accept the loss?

Do I hide the tears for only my own pillow to soak up? Or do I cling to the tear covered cross?

Do I let satan win? Or do I accept that God knows best?

Do I put up walls? Or do I get excited for my future?

Cuz here's the situation, God knows my hopes and dreams. He knows that all I want is to be a wife and a mother. He knows. And here's the deal, that might not be the path He needs me to take.

I need to be okay with that.

I am not here to be a wife. I am not here to be a mother.

I am here to enjoy my Creator.

God understands loss. He understands a broken heart. God can handle whatever we need to lay at His feet; which needs to be everything.

God hates a wishy washy person. (Revelation 3:15-16)

Pick a side!

It's all or nothing.

I choose the road less traveled.

I know who wins in the end. :)

But until that day comes I just have to remember to breathe and enjoy my Creator.

That's it.

In both the highs and the lows.

I just have to keep breathing and enjoy my Creator.

Join me, won't you?

It's not easy.

But it is best.

So today I will consider it pure joy while I face these trials. (James 1:2)

This is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalm 118:24)